Satirical website The Onion has completely owned an Iran news agency.
The Iran news outlet published as true a story from The Onion saying rural white Americans would rather vote for President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad than Barack Obama.
Just because it's satire doesn't mean it isn't true.
You probably remember the steady stream of various hangings of effigies around the nation since Obama took office, many of them done on or near Christian churches.
It's probably still fresh in your mind, too, all the boos and catcalls the Obamas receive wherever they go, even if it's to do charity work somewhere.
Of course, for lack of respect to both the man and the office, it's difficult to beat that moment in a joint session of Congress where, in the middle of a speech, President Obama was greeted with a GOP jackass's call of "You lie!"
That bullet-hole-riddled outhouse on a trailer is probably still fresh in your mind, too -- the one pulled around at the Montana GOP convention for laughs, the one featuring assorted racial slurs and slanders: the one clearly marked "Obama Presidential Library."
And, of course, the GOP vows from the House and Senate to make Obama a one-term president only, no matter what, it being a priority at the very top of their lists, to the detriment of all the other People's business...
Well, what's a little coast-to-coast lockjaw and Congressional gridlock in service to a heaping helping of some Good Ol' Boy racism?
Racists even cordially placed a cherry on top of their wish lists for us to all see: Teabagger shrieks of We got to take our country back! are always squarely aimed at the black man in the White House.
Had Bush the junior and his wife been subjected to the treatment shoved onto Obama and his wife, a great deal of the population would have been rounded up, given anti-patriotism hearings in football stadiums around the country, pronounced guilty in 14 seconds flat, with on-site executions starting to have been seriously considered right about then.
While it's true the Iran news agency that went with the Onion spoof as legitimate news has some humble-pie eating to do, a fair question to consider is this: How could they have known any better?
Aside from the peculiarities of humor from region to region, all the signs are certainly present in the U.S. that the story is most likely true.
There is nothing in our recent history, nor in the last 200-plus years, to suggest the story might be incorrect.
While that Iran news agency screws up their courage to face their public, hat in hand, ready to apologize, still chewing on humble pie, we here in the 'States have forgotten we're all still chewing away on our own just desserts:
Hereabouts, we Americans prefer eating crow -- Jim Crow -- baked up in a pie.
It's an old recipe that has been fine-tuned over the years in the south: Four and twenty blackbirds baked in a pie...
Funny thing -- we keep baking these things, and we keep chewing and chewing on them, but we can't ever seem to swallow and end this damn meal, and be finally done with it, so we can go on to something else that might actually be important in this very short life.
Funny, too -- for beings who generally have such a predictable, insatiable sweet tooth, we humans always use way too much bittersweet in all our recipes.
Regarding the news agency in Iran: http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-middle-east-19764166
Original version from The Onion: http://www.theonion.com/articles/gallup-poll-rural-whites-prefer-ahmadinejad-to-oba,29677/