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Alex Baer

Getting All Up in Someone's Faith

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It's Sunday, and Elvis's Bible just brought $94,000 at auction.

We are left in the pews wondering what Jesus might have made of that, in light of so many clear instructions and concise admonitions that the wealthy are to give their riches and material possessions to the poor.

There are likely no specific passages in the Bible providing a loophole to hoard wealth in order to buy a spendy celebrity Bible, but the ironies are still striking.

Not to get into a scripture-shootin' war here, but you'd think Matthew 19:21, Luke 12:33, and Proverbs 22:16 -- among many others -- would have had plenty to say to the devout, and have guided and coaxed much better behavior by now from all well-heeled Bible-thumpers.

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Last Updated on Sunday, 09 September 2012 18:40

Dancing as Fast as We Can, and Then Some

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Every time we seem to make any progress as a species, we tend to immediately slump back from the effort, exhausted.  Then, we invent something to take care of the new problem we've created from our initial efforts, and go on with our lives -- satisfied with a job well done.

In other places and times, this might have been called playing to a draw, but in our country, it's usually called Progress.

One of the most hair-raising and intriguing dances is life itself, of course -- although global climate change, religious conflicts and wars of all kinds are spine-chilling, too.  Those dances are all still in continuous motion, as is the case with the most intricate, hypnotic motions.

Here are some steps I've fallen over lately, ( just call me Dances with Gooney Birds ), and which have yielded curious results on examination:

Last Updated on Friday, 07 September 2012 21:53

Memory, Through the Looking Glass

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You might remember President Obama saying he wanted to look forward, not back.  You may also remember Speaker Pelosi telling all of us that impeachment was off the table.

Memory is a most peculilar thing.

Those forgive-and-forget statements grow more stunning with time.  This is especially true now that Obama's Attorney General, Eric Holder, has in effect crashed any hopes of holding Bush administration officials accountable for torture and other abuses and crimes.

Holder has said no one would be prosecuted in the deaths of two prisoners held in CIA custody.  The chief lawyer of the U.S. government has said the lack of prosecution is not from moral acceptance but is symptomatic of the record being "not sufficient to obtain and sustain a conviction."

Last Updated on Thursday, 06 September 2012 20:36

Bizarro Phases & Places

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It's been a long weekend of eyebrow-lifting reports, likely the perceptual hangovers from the holiday, combined with the come-and-go effects of our ongoing intersection with the Bizarro Universe.

Steely-eyed readers with exceptional powers of recall will remember these odd and unpredictable effects on life in this universe first began because of -- or resulted in -- Willard Romney's selection of Paul Ryan to be his Veep-runner in this marathon presidential race.

Head of Monitoring at the Truly Vast Array of Radio Dishes, Optical Telescopes, and the Koole-Lukking Instrumentation Cluster at Imposing Institute, Dr. Oliver Sudden, said, "We've been keeping an eye on Bizarro outbreaks over the weekend, and there's been a rise in dumbfounding events -- although there's nothing quite like Americans having a long holiday during a full moon, either, to kick things up a notch."

Last Updated on Tuesday, 04 September 2012 21:02

Lyin' Ryan and the Tangled-Web Weavers

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This is getting to be a serial adventure with this guy, like Harry Potter -- but way heavier at the nightmare end of things.

So far, Paul Ryan's running his campaign as Veep wannabe about like he does a marathon:  running his own course, running his mouth, and running out his clock on his own sense of time and timing.  For someone who considers himself so fleet of foot, he's certainly being footloose with the truth, getting so often tripped up by it and tangled all around in it.

Lyin' Ryan, in his latest poleaxing of the truth,  shaved more than an hour off his marathon time.  Despite impressions he's let stand to the contrary, he's run only one marathon, and clocked more than 4 hours finishing, versus that "2 hour and 50-something" he's stated.

Last Updated on Sunday, 02 September 2012 23:15

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